Torah Portion RE’EH – Devarim (Deuteronomy) 11:26-16:17

THE CODEPENDENCY OF KING AHAB

THE CODEPENDENCY OF KING AHAB

He said to him, “Thus says YHVH, ‘Because you have let go out of your hand the man whom I had devoted to destruction, therefore your life shall go for his life, and your people for his people.’” 1 Kings 20:42

 

Shabbat shalom dearly beloved,

In this Bible story of the battles between the very cruel king of Aram Ben-hadad and Ahab the king of The House of Israel or the Kingdom of the North, we find all the components of a typical codependency that may be affecting us politically and personally. Aram is ancient Assyria which would cover the territory of modern day Syria, Iraq and even Iran.

 

Aram had been attacking Israel for nearly 100 years. There were constant wars and many times he Northern Kingdom of Israel lost the battle because of their idolatry. Jeroboam the Son of Nebat the first king of the Northern Kingdom (not a Judean) established golden calves in Bethel and in Dan then he commanded the Sons of Israel (the 10 Northern Tribes, not Judah) to worship them instead of going up to Jerusalem to worship YHVH.

 

However, as for the sins of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, which he made Israel sin, from these Jehu did not depart, even the golden calves that were at Bethel and that were at Dan. 2 Kings 10:29

 

Thus he established a Replacement Theology/Worship system that brought about the judgment of God. The way that Yah (God) would judge His People was by delivering them into the hands of their enemies. Thus the consecutive kings of Israel that continue worshipping Baal and causing the people to sin were judged one after the other and Aram was the vehicle of judgment.

 

King Ahab was the worst of all the Northern Israel kings. He married Jezebel, the priestess of the temple of baal and ashera (Ishtar-Easter) and the daughter of Etbaal, the King of Sidon. However Ahab was a very codependent man. He would not stand for what is right. His codependency led him and his household and eventually all the House of Israel, Northern Kingdom to exile and destruction.

 

But first, what is CODEPENDENCY?

 

Codependent relationships are a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one person supports or enables another person’s addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement. Among the core characteristics of codependency, the most common theme is an excessive reliance on other people for approval and identity. http://interventiontreatmentrecovery.org/education/codependency/

 

AHAB WAS A NICE GUY

2Ahab was a “nice guy”, he wanted to please his idolatrous wife and her father even though it meant betraying The God of Israel and His People. He would have been a great pastor of a “seeker friendly” church where the said pastors are afraid of offending the “seekers” by opening Bibles and preaching the Word of God, including repentance, obedience, judgment and hell!

 

 

Disclaimer: Listening to the wise council of a Godly wife does not make a husband “an Ahab” (it rather makes him WISE!), but yielding to the whims of an idolatrous one by betraying Godly Principles does.

 

But Jezebel was not the only person Ahab wanted to please and be a nice guy to. He wanted to please his enemies and especially the cruelest and blood thirsty one, Ben-hadad the King of Aram.

 

Ahab was what I would call a “nice Christian” that has interpreted the Word of Yah to a fault that He did not intend. Ben-hadad was bullying Ahab and had told him that everything that belonged to the king of Israel was his, including wife and children!

 

Then he sent messengers to the city to Ahab king of Israel and said to him, “Thus says Ben-hadad, ‘Your silver and your gold are mine; your most beautiful wives and children are also mine.’” The king of Israel replied, “It is according to your word, my lord, O king; I am yours, and all that I have. 1 Kings 20:2-4

 

Principle #1- Codependent people want to please and they are afraid of confrontation. Due to that they allow abusive relationships and do not stop them on time!

AHAB STANDS UP TO HIS ABUSER

But about this time tomorrow I will send my servants to you, and they will search your house and the houses of your servants; and whatever is desirable in your eyes, they will take in their hand and carry away.’” 1 Kings 20:6

 

3Finally Ahab wakes up to the fact that this Ben-hadad is viciously wicked when the king of Aram decided to send his administration to check his possessions and seize anything they wanted. (Any administrations like this in your country?).

 

When Ahab consults with his elders they advise this weak king to STAND UP to his oppressor which Ahab does. This causes the pride of the king of Aram to be hurt and he girds himself to come and destroy Northern Israel altogether. However he did not take into consideration YHVH, The God of Israel who had paid attention to the first Act of Bravery that he had seen in Ahab.

 

So he said to the messengers of Ben-hadad, “Tell my lord the king, ‘All that you sent for to your servant at the first I will do, but this thing I cannot do.’1 Kings 20:9

 

Even though YHVH Himself was using Ben-hadad as a tool of judgment against idolatrous Israel, He was going to show Himself MIGHTY for His name -sake and fight for His Covenant People!

 

Now behold, a prophet approached Ahab king of Israel and said, “Thus says YHVH, ‘Have you seen all this great multitude? Behold, I will deliver them into your hand today, and you shall know that I am YHVH. 1 Kings 20:13

 

Principle #2- God fights alongside of those who choose to stand up against bullies and abusers both in the spiritual (the devil and evil spirits) and in the natural (people)!

 

THE BATTLE IS WON BUT THE WAR IS LOST

4Just as YHVH promised through the Word of His Prophet, Ahab won the battle and Aram had to retreat after serious losses. Not only did he win one battle but TWO. Ben-hadad retreated but then returned again to bully Ahab a few months later. The God of Israel fought for Ahab one more time and Aram was seriously defeated. The King of Aram managed to escape alive but did not stand a chance of recovery! This could have been the end of the story and what a Happy End this would have been! But Ahab still the “nice guy” messed this ending seriously and lost the war and all of Northern Israel with him!

 

The advisors of Ben-hadad were astute men. They convinced Ben-hadad to ask mercy from the king of Israel, because the kings of Israel were known to be merciful kings!

 

So they girded sackcloth on their loins and put ropes on their heads, and came to the king of Israel and said, “Your servant Ben-hadad says, ‘Please let me live.’” And he said, “Is he still alive? He is my brother.” 1 Kings 20:32

 

“Sweet” Ahab! He was calling the Hitler of the time (Ben-hadad) “his brother”. Now that sounds like a real “Christian thing to do” as the Word of God instructs us to love our enemies is it not? It also tells us to give the other cheek and to repay good for evil. Except the ending of this story shows that this was the WRONG thing to do! The motivation of Ahab was “to find favor with the enemy”, to have a “good relationship with a snake”.

 

Ben-hadad said to him, “The cities which my father took from your father I will restore, and you shall make streets for yourself in Damascus, as my father made in Samaria.” Ahab said, “And I will let you go with this covenant.” So he made a covenant with him and let him go. 1 Kings 20:34

 

This was an UNHOLY ALLIANCE! This was a FALSE PEACE TREATY! Just like the one the nations have tried to impose on Israel since 1990. Most Israeli governments have been as weak as King Ahab and have been in the negotiating table with those who want to destroy them simply to please the nations! There is no peace possible with those who exist for the sole agenda of annihilating Israel. Just like in the case of King Ahab, Israel has been CODEPENDANT on the favor of the nations because of idolatry, because it has not functioned in faith and the Fear of YHVH. The evil neighbors and enemies of Israel are devoted to destruction UNLESS they turn to worship The God of Israel.

 

Then if they will really learn the ways of My people, to swear by My name, ‘As YHVH lives,’ even as they taught My people to swear by Baal, they will be built up in the midst of My people. But if they will not listen, then I will uproot that nation, uproot and destroy it,” declares YHVH. Jeremiah 12:16-17

 

To make treaties with those whom YHVH Himself has devoted to destruction is to defy the Almighty Himself!

 

He said to him, “Thus says YHVH, ‘Because you have let go out of your hand the man whom I had devoted to destruction, therefore your life shall go for his life, and your people for his people.’” 1 Kings 20:42

 

Principle #3- DO NOT MAKE COVENANTS WITH YOUR ABUSERS WHEN THEY ARE WEAK FOR THEY WILL SURELY GET STRENGTHENED AND ABUSE YOU AGAIN.

 

ISLAM AND HUDNA

5Islam is an abusive religion and it seeks world conquest. They have many principles in the Quran that people in the west do not understand. One of these principles is HUDNA. Hudna is a kind of a “cease fire” or “peace treaty”. But the full implication of Hudna is the following: “When your enemy is stronger than you, make temporary peace with him. As soon as you get stronger, strike and kill him”.

 

This is how the Palestinian Cause has advanced, Hudna after Hudna followed by war after war against Israel.

 

In the same way ALL ABUSE HAS THE HUDNA PRINCIPLE. So when you are in an abusive relationship and you see that the abusive partner is humbled, DO NOT TRUST HIM/HER. You must allow PLENTY OF TIME for them to prove worthy of your trust. Some times it never happens, and you must come to terms with that possibility as well.

 

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. Matthew 3:8

 

Repentance must be followed by FRUIT of repentance! Repentance is TESHUVA which means Turning and Returning for the purpose of RESTORATION. When an abuser turns and returns to the ways of God, he or she must show consistent fruit for a considerable amount of time. They must maintain themselves humble, teachable and instructable at all times. If you have such a person in your life and you have been codependent, consider standing up to it and putting an end to the abuse. Trust The Almighty to be with you and seek the HELP of knowledgeable, authoritative and anointed people. But abuse left unchecked will only grow and lead to destruction.

 

Let us pray that Israel wake up from codependency on the favor of the United Nations and may each one of us develop healthy relationships and bring all abuse to a screeching halt!

 

T9he God of Shalom will soon crush satan under your feet. Romans 16:20

Your Israeli Mentors and Friends,

Archbishop Dominiquae and Rabbi Baruch Bierman

For Zion’s sake I will not keep silent. Isaiah 62:1

 

  • Disclaimer: The author of this article is not a psychologist but brings the Biblical Perspective on Psychological subjects.
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